dorm culture in zijing

so i've not yet gone to bed, but am sitting in my dorm room, surrounded by laundry, door open. i'm so used to the community of lmf, and the open-door culture, that the fact that my door is open and i am alone makes me think that i am (a) friendless (just kidding), and (b) a little lonely. ok, (b) is true. granted, it is past midnight, and we're all tired, but coming home to my empty room is kind of depressing, so that neither studio nor home is a particularly attractive place to go. it would be better if i had been able to make my room more home-like in the way that my apartment is like home, but limited luggage capacity nixed that idea. on the other hand, i do need my alone time, and i'm getting towards my limit of too much time spent with other people, but alone time at night before i go to bed isn't really my idea of good alone time. i'd rather wander around campus, the city, or a museum, but there's never free time when i'd like to do those things. in a way, i've been behaving very differently here than i do at home, in my native environment, and i feel like i'm a little less myself than is the norm. i don't have the things by which i usually define myself, like my home, cooking, walking around cambridge, my friends and family, and mit. the loss of these things has left me scrambling a little bit for what i've still got with me that's me; my biggest fear is that, after everything is said and done, i'm a boring person.